AIM With the Cullens
by Roxy-x-Wayland
Summary: Emmet loves Hannah Montana things, Jacob thinks Bella loves him and Alice is, well Alice. Read to find out more!
1. Hannah Montana Porn?

**Alice- OMFGSHOES**

**Bella- Bite_me**

**Edward- I-hear-you**

**Emmett- 2macho4U**

**Esme- Cooking-mama**

**Rosalie- B.L.O.N.D.E**

**Carlisle- Doctor-Mc-Sexy**

**Jacob- Wolfman2000**

**Jasper- Jasper-the-friendly-ghost**

_**OMFGSHOES HAS SIGNED ON**_

_**Bite_me HAS SIGNED ON**_

**OMFGSHOES**: Hi Bella!

**Bite_me**: Hi Alice

**OMFGSHOES**: Bella want to go shopping?

**Bite_me**: No way in Hell

_**2macho4U HAS SIGNED ON**_

_**B.L.O.N.D.E HAS SIGNED ON**_

**B.L.O.N.D.E**: Alice are we going shopping with Bella later?

**OMFGSHOES**: She said she didn't want to come

**B.L.O.N.D.E**: Please Bella?

**Bite_me:** fine! BUT IM NOT BUYING ANYTHING SEXY

**OMFGSHOES**: Humph.

**2macho4U**: Bella are you buying something nice for Eddie Poo?

**OMFGSHOES**: Go watch your Hannah Montana Porn Emmett

**2macho4U**: I do not watch Hannah Montana porn!

**OMFGSHOES**: Oh yeah? Then why did I have a vision that you were?

**2macho4U**: I flipped to the wrong channel!

**Bite_me:** sure you did Emmett…

**B.L.O.N.D.E**: ROFL YOU SO DO WATCH HANNAH MONTANA PORN!!!

_**Cooking-mama HAS SIGNED ON**_

**OMFGSHOES**: Esme! Emmett was watching Hannah Montana porn again!

**Cooking-mama**: EMMETT! HOW COULD YOU?

**2macho4U**: But Esme!

**Cooking-mama**: I don't want to hear it! Do it again and you will be grounded!

**2macho4U**: thanks a lot you guys…

_**2macho4U HAS SIGNED OFF**_

**OMFGSHOES**: Esme want to go shopping with Bella, Rose and I this afternoon?

**Cooking-mama**: Sure that sounds lovely!

**OMFGSHOES**: Great! We're going at about 3:30 is that okay?

**Cooking-mama**: that's lovely dear now I have to go tell Carlisle about Emmett I'll see you girls at 3:30

_**Cooking-mama HAS SIGNED OFF**_

**B.L.O.N.D.E**: Wow that was a good one Alice, Hannah Montana porn? LOL

**Bite_me**: Yeah that was a good one!

**OMFGSHOES**: thanks I know!

_**Jasper-the-friendly-ghost HAS SIGNED ON**_

**Jasper-the-friendly-ghost**: what did you guys do to Emmett? He's all pissed off at you 3

**OMFGSHOES**: We told Esme he watched Hannah Montana porn

**Jasper-the-friendly-ghost**: Nice!

_**Jasper-the-friendly-ghost HAS SIGNED OFF**_

_**Wolfman2000 HAS SIGNED ON**_

**Wolfman2000: **BELLA!

**Bite_me:** yes Jacob?

**Wolfman2000: **You love me! You know you do! Stop faking and get your ass over here right now!

**B.L.O.N.D.E: **In your dreams Mutt!

**Wolfman2000: **YOU WILL SEE BELLA SWAN! YOU WILL LOVE ME!

_**Wolfman200 HAS SIGNED OFF**_

**OMFGSHOES: **Dude

**Bite_me: **WoW…

**B.L.O.N.D.E: **OMG.

_**OMFGSHOES HAS SIGNED OFF**_

_**B.L.O.N.D.E HAS SIGNED OFF**_

_**Bite_me: HAS SIGNED OFF**_

_**AUTHORS NOTE**_

**well, I hope you guys liked it!!**

**There will be more as soon as I figure how to put new chapters!**


	2. Renesme never sleeps

**Alice- OMFGSHOES**

**Bella- Bite_me**

**Edward- I-hear-you**

**Emmett- 2macho4U**

**Esme- Cooking-mama**

**Rosalie- B.L.O.N.D.E**

**Carlisle- Doctor-Mc-Sexy**

**Jacob- Wolfman2000**

**Jasper- Jasper-the-friendly-ghost**

**Renesme- HALF-HALF**

_**OMFGSHOES HAS SIGNED ON**_

_**I-hear-you HAS SIGNED ON**_

_**Bite_me HAS SIGNED ON**_

**Bite_me: **OMG EDWARD I TOTALLY GIVE YOU PREMISSION TO KICK JACOB'S ASS!

**I-hear-you: **What happed love?

**OMFGSHOES: **He ran around the mall screaming YOU LOVE ME BELLA SWAN AND YOU KNOW IT!

**I-hear-you: **I'm going to get Jasper and Emmett

_**2macho4U HAS SIGNED ON**_

_**Jasper-the-friendly-ghost HAS SIGNED ON**_

**I-hear-you: **We must kick Jacob Black's ass

**2macho4U: **What did he do?

**Jasper-the-friendly-ghost: **LETS DO IT!

_**2macho4U HAS SIGNED OFF**_

_**Jasper-the-friendly-ghost HAS SIGNED OFF**_

**I-hear-you: **I'll see you soon, Love

_**I-hear-you HAS SIGNED OFF**_

**OMFGSHOES: **Oh, Edward will just love the sexy bra and panties you bought

**Bite_me: **I really hope so, there blue. His favorite color

**OMFGSHOES: **Bella!!! He'll love them!

**Bite_me: **ALICE!!!! YOU DID NOT WATCH YOUR BROTHER HAVE SEX AND ME!

**OMFGSHOES: **I just wanted to see if he'd like the set and you scream very loudly. No wonder Renesme never gets any sleep ;)

**Bite_me: **ALICE!!!!!!!

**OMFGSHOES: **ROFL

**Bite_me HAS SIGNED OFF**

_**HALF-HALF HAS SIGNED ON**_

**HALF-HALF: **You made mom mad!

**OMFGSHOES: **It was so funny!

**HALF-HALF: **what did you do?

**OMFGSHOES**: saw them having sex and said no wonder Renesme never sleeps!

**HALF-HALF: **OMG LOL

**OMFGSHOES**: I KNOW!!! :D

_**HALF-HALF HAS SIGNED OFF**_

_**OMFGSHOES HAS SIGNED OFF**_


	3. Are you PMSing?

**Alice- OMFGSHOES**

**Bella- Bite_me**

**Edward- I-hear-you**

**Emmett- 2macho4U**

**Esme- Cooking-mama**

**Rosalie- B.L.O.N.D.E**

**Carlisle- Doctor-Mc-Sexy**

**Jacob- Wolfman2000**

**Jasper- Jasper-the-friendly-ghost**

**Renesme- HALF-HALF**

_**HALF-HALF HAS SIGNED ON**_

_**Wolfman2000 HAS SIGNED ON**_

**HALF-HALF: **Why did you do that to mom? I thought you loved me?

**Wolfman2000: **I, I don't know why I did that

**HALF-HALF: **Are you PMS-ing?

**Wolfman2000: **I'M A GUY!

**HALF-HALF: **Yes but you're a wolf, your different then other dudes.

_**OMFGSHOES HAS SIGNED ON**_

**OMFGSHOES: **Nessie! Your mother told you not to talk to evil wolf people

**HALF-HALF: **But Alice! I love him!

**OMFGSHOES:** And he loves your mother!

**Wolfman2000: **Hey! I love Nessie not Bella!

**OMFGSHOES: **sure you do…

_**OMFGSHOES HAS SIGNED OFF**_

**HALF-HALF: **I think I better go, Mom is gonna bust a cap.

_**HALF-HALF HAS SIGNED OFF**_

_**Bite_me HAS SIGNED ON**_

**Wolfman2000: **crap.

**Bite_me: **Yeah Crap is right!

**Wolfman2000: **Bella, I

**Bite_me:** NO! I AM TALKING! STAY AWAY FROM MY DAUGHTER AND ME OR I WILL EAT YOUR FACE!

**Wolfman2000: **Wow! Someone's PMS-ing…

**Bite_me: **SHUT UP!

_**Wolfman2000 HAS SIGNED OFF**_

_**HALF-HALF HAS SIGNED ON**_

**HALF-HALF: **Jacob?

**Bite_me: **Nessie, I am warning you. STAY AWAY FROM THAT MUTT!

**HALF-HALF: **Wow mom, PMS much?

_**HALF-HALF HAS SIGNED OFF**_

**Bite_me: **Why does everybody say that?

_**I-hear-you HAS SIGNED ON**_

**I-hear-you: **Hello, love

**Bite_me: **Hi Eddy-kins

**I-hear-you: **Bella, are you high?

**Bite_me: **NO!

**I-hear-you: **Are you PMS-ing?

**Bite_me: **WHY DOES EVERYBODY KEEP SAYING THAT! :(

**I-hear-you: **Because you are having major mood swings

**Bite_me: **Oh!

**I-hear-you: **Its okay, love

**Bite_me: **so what exactly did you guys do to Jacob?

**I-hear-you: **Well, while he was sleeping we shaved his head bought a very curly wig put it on his head and decorated hi face.

**Bite_me: **Intense

**I-hear-you: **This I know.

_**I-hear-you HAS SIGNED OFF**_

_**Bite_me HAS SIGNED OFF**_


	4. I Gotta Feeling?

**Alice- OMFGSHOES**

**Bella- Bite_me**

**Edward- I-hear-you**

**Emmett- 2macho4U**

**Esme- Cooking-mama**

**Rosalie- B.L.O.N.D.E**

**Carlisle- Doctor-Mc-Sexy**

**Jacob- Wolfman2000**

**Jasper- Jasper-the-friendly-ghost**

**Leah- Wolftastic-girl**

**Seth- Seth90210**

_**SETH90210 HAS SIGNED ON**_

_**I-HEAR-YOU HAS SIGNED ON**_

_**BITE_ME HAS SIGNED ON**_

**Seth90210: **Guys, I think theres something wrong with Leah :S

**I-Hear-You: **Why Seth?

**Seth90210: **She lit a fire in the backyard and started dancing and started dancing around it chanting: _LEACH MUST DIE, DEATH, DEATH, DEATH, MAUHAHAHAHA_

**Bite_me: **Intense e_o

**Seth90210: **IKNOWRIGHT?!

**I-Hear-You: **What do you think she was doing?

**Bite_Me: **Eddie-kins can we sing?

**Seth90210: **OMG OMG OMG LETS SING THAT NEW SONG BY THE BLACK EYES PEAS!!!!!!!

**Bite_me: **_I Gotta Feeling, that tonight's gonna be a good night_

**I-Hear-You: **-Gasps- I'll go get ready!! :D

**Bite_Me: **No wait, Edward!

_**I-HEAR-YOU HAS SIGNED OFF**_

**Seth90210: **Dude, you gonna tell him that it was a song?

**Bite_me: **Nah, Maybe later ;)

_**BITE_ME HAS SIGNED OFF**_

**SETH90210: **OH SNAP!

**Note:**

**If you wanna be in the next chapter leave a review containing what you want your AIM name to be :D**


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